Been awhile since I rattled off about my life, so I’ll try to sum up some shit here. Getting some things off my chest. It’s one of the ways I cope. Well, that, and making fucked-up jokes about it all. I seem to be the only one who laughs at those, most of the time. I’ll be splitting this up into sections, for easier digestion.
Mom
Went to see my mom in Colorado last week. She’s got an oxygen tank now. The cord coming out of it is long enough to allow her free movement throughout her entire house – which is a two-story, 4 bedroom semi-mansion in the hills. Technically, she doesn’t “need” it, but the nurse says it makes her feel better. Remember Fight Club? “Oxygen.. gets you high”.
She’s on a cocktail of painkillers – morphine, marijuana, uppers, downers, all manner of drugs meant to keep her pain to a minimum while counteracting the other pills she takes so she doesn’t collapse or go into seizures.
It’s tough to watch, and even tougher when you’re looking at a woman who has spent every waking moment of her life running around at 100 miles per hour. This is a woman who wouldn’t sit down on her birthday (which the rest of you call “Christmas Day”) while we offered to do the dishes for her, clean the kitchen, and bring her dinner/dessert/wine. She’d always say “hold on, I’m just taking care of something real quick” and we’d all have to yell “No! sit down! We’ve got this!”. Now, ironically enough, she has no choice but to be waited on. She barely has the strength to stand up anymore.
While I was out there, it occurred to me that it would be the last visit I’ll have with her. Realizing that, I sat with her during one of the moments when she was alert enough to have a conversation, and told her that she did a good job in life. She was an amazing teacher – something her students have told me time and time again throughout my life, even when she wasn’t around. She was an amazing mother – and I told her never to spend another moment wondering if she did the right thing, or if she was there for us enough. I’ve had enough friends in my life with absentee/abusive/dismissive parents to know what differentiates good parenting from bad parenting. I thought it important that she heard me, as her son, tell her that I was proud to call her my mother. And that I can only hope to give my children the love, care, and good parenting she has shown me (and my sister, who’s also a very good mother).
She appreciated the sentiment, and for the first time in my life, she simply said “thank you, Mitchell”, without arguing about things she’s done wrong. She understands it now. I don’t think one can ever be “ready” to lose their parent(s), but my sister and I have gotten to the point that all we want is a safe, pain-free existence for her, however short that might end up being.
I had to make her video memorial for her, since she never got a chance to get around to it. My good friend Sean told me to choose the Somewhere Over the Rainbow / What a Wonderful World medley done by the late Hawaiian artist Israel Kamakawiwo’ole (I uploaded a copy here) – and man, he nailed it. The song turned out to be a perfect backdrop to the photos I have of her, which are lead into by a 5-minute highlight reel of the 90-minute interview I did with her during Christmas 2007. It’s a little hard to watch. Nay, exceedingly hard to watch. But, ya know.. you do what your mother says, right?
Comedy
As you may have noticed, I’ve been doing a lot more gigs recently. Nothing close to a “normal” comedian, I s’pose, but definitely more than I normally perform in a given period of time. I’m preparing for two separate gigs right now. Details are in my last blog.
The upcoming gig at The Comedy Store will be my first time rockin’ their main stage. That’s exciting, and a big step for me – considering I only performed at the Belly Room once. Friends I had back when I had comedian friends had to do that 5-6 times before ever getting a Main Stage booking. Still.. I’m only being booked for 6 minutes. Not exactly “woo hoo” times. I fucking hate Bringer shows.
“What’s a ‘Bringer’ show, Mitcz?”
Well, kids, a Bringer show is when you’re booked to perform at a club and you’re asked to bring you friends and make them cough up ridiculous wads of cash to see you perform. Ideally, you’d have some overwhelming fanbase that just can’t wait to pay money for such an opportunity. The obvious catch-22 is, of course, if you had a local fanbase that would pay to see you perform – you wouldn’t be slingin’ 6 minute sets at local clubs, you’d just headline instead. Funny how that works, isn’t it?
This is pretty much why I never bothered with the local comedy circuit. Too much bullshit like that going around. But, who knows, maybe I’ll kick 6-minutes worth of ass, and they’ll be like “hey! here’s 20 minutes! You’re opening for (some national act)!”. A guy can dream, can’t he?
The following Monday, I’m doing a full 15-minute set at Howl at the Moon at the Universal City Walk. If there’s any way you can make it to that one – I’d recommend doing so. The drinks are cheap ($3 well vodka!) and the cover is only $5. It’s gonna be a helluva show. And, having 15 solid minutes to tear up the stage is something I haven’t had in years – so you better believe I’m gonna bring the hammer down.
In other comedy news – I wrote my first political joke the other day. I feel good about it, and I’ve slipped it into conversation during a BBQ party I went to last weekend, where it got a pretty good response. All I’m going to say right now is that it involves John McCain and a Cleveland Steamer.
Acting
The new season of Entourage starts this weekend, and sometime during that season there will be an episode where the boys have a “first-day wrap party” with the cast & crew of the fake movie being filmed during the show. During that episode, you might see my lanky prep-ass (without piercings), somewhere in the background, slinging drinks in a red polo shirt. Hooray? I guess.
I’ve got an audition tomorrow morning for a role that I feel good about. Seems like the sort of thing that’s right up my alley. I have no idea if I’ll get it, so I’m keeping any further details to myself. If I nail it – you’ll know about it :)
Sometime during the following week, I’m finally filming my scenes for a semi-secret project I was cast for almost a year ago. I can only hope it’ll be as fun as hanging out w/the cast in the past has been. Again, when I can reveal details – I will.
NoTalent is in post-production on their most recent film “My First Date Book”, where I play the lead character’s best friend. Who gives shitty advice throughout the movie. Should be fun to see it play out, though. The script/plot was pretty funny.
Later this year, I’ll be playing a small role in my first feature-length horror film “LAN Party Massacre”. It’s been getting a lot of buzz lately through the geek crowd (thanks to a nice push at Comic Con) and I really look forward to not only working on it, but seeing the finished product. I’d say that even if I weren’t involved – it really does look badass.
Around the first half of December, you can look forward to me making a complete ass of myself on national TV in a reality show that I still can’t tell any of you about. Suffice it to say – it’ll be worth seeing, if for no other reason than to watch a drunk Mitcz try to deal with the pure insanity of a group of reality TV stars in a multi-million dollar mansion. I doubt I’ll be on for more than one episode, so keep your eyes on this space so I can tell you which hour of TV you should waste your time watching.
Oddly enough, the film I went all the way to Idaho to make – wherein I played a mullet-wearing redneck – I’ve heard nothing about. The director disappeared off the face of the planet. I’m starting to wonder if maybe he did it for some weird private fetish project that he keeps in his basement to giggle about. If you’re reading this, oh secret man – I’d still like to see it, no matter how fucking weird it ended up being!
All of that having been said – I’m still not sure if I should be acting. I’ve really only seen one film project I’ve acted in make its way to a semi-finished state, so I’m still waiting to see the one where I go “ahh yeah. THAT was good acting”.
Maybe actors don’t ever do that. Unless they’re self-absorbed shitheads. Like.. Tom Cruise. Did I mention he’s gay? Cause he is. I don’t have a problem with that, but he does. So, Tom? If you’re listening – you can’t hide from me. I know you lust after hot little man-ass. The HE-PUSSY.
Leftovers..
I’ll be turning 30 at the end of next month. I’m almost getting used to that idea, as I could technically start saying I’m 30 now. But, I’m not yet ready. On the plus side – as a comedian, 30 ain’t shit. So, here’s to the last 1/3rd of 2008, eh?
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