Mitcz.com : Official blog of Rev. Mitcz, the demented devilish comedian from Hollywood, CA.

I’m really fuckin’ tickled pink when I read shit like this. George Rekers, especially, is the perfect person to get caught up in a gay prostitution scandal. It’s not the first time, of course, but.. ohhh how deep the rabbit hole goes.

What I love about stories of hypocrisy from hate-mongers, gay-bashers, cross-bearers and the general stench of their associated ilk is just how fucking obvious the whole thing is. Every time another of these scandals pops up, “thou dost protest too much” rings like a church bell through the nation. I hope it continues on. In droves. Just an overwhelming outing of every hair-brained shitcock who stands at the ready of a podium, shouting hateful jargon …

I was reading through OKCupid’s fascinating number-crunching blog “OKTrends” and stumbled upon an entry about success rates for wording in messages. If you have 5 minutes to spare, give it a read.

Nonetheless, here’s a quick breakdown of Do’s and Don’ts.

Do Not…

Use netspeak/slang. (words like “ur”, “u”, “luv”) or bad spelling (“wut”, “realy”, “cant”)
Use physical compliments (“you’re sexy”, “beautiful”, “hey cutie”, etc)
Mention using outside services to get to know them (email, AIM, yahoo, cellphone, etc)
Mention god. Unsurprisingly (to me, at least), Jesus and God decrease reply rates even amongst other religious terms.

Do…

Be humble, especially for men. Surprisingly “sorry”, “awkward” and “apologize” all had high success rates.
Mention something in …

One of my favorite bloggers and cartoonists (Scott Adams, of Dilbert fame) once asked “how the fuck do you explain the popularity of horror movies?“. I sat on this article for awhile, and realized I never finished it, so I’m doing that now. I will not only answer his question, but give some pretty elaborate examples behind my reasoning. I realize this is better as a Halloween post and not a damn-near-the-holidays post, but to hell with conventions.

As I see it, the love for horror movies boils down to one or more of the following :

We love/relate to the hero(es)

We love/relate to the villain(s)

We just want a demented laugh

We …

This post is mostly here so I can link my friends to a central source for something interesting I found (in my travels ’round the interwebz) to “cure” the so-called common cold. While I, personally, have done this, and can verify that it worked for me – I feel like I should drop a number of disclaimers and notes first.

I am not a doctor
I am not getting paid by anyone to tell you this shit
I am not some anti-corporate conspiracy theorist shithead who’s going to tell you this information “is what THEY don’t want you to know, man!”
I could give two shits if you take any of this seriously or not. Again, …

I read a post on GodsGirls, in the “relationships” forum, that intrigued me (identifying details removed)…

so I’ve been dating my boyfriend since <date removed> that makes it <a lot of> years… Before that I was dating this guy who had some issues and moved out to <another state>. Now I’m having some strong feelings towards him again….should I move out to <another state> or not?

My (shortened version) reply was..

For the love of all things you hold dear – DO NOT do this because you think some fantasy you’ve cooked up in your head is gonna work out for you, or that this guy’s suddenly gonna drop everything and agree with your mindset. People almost never change. …

I’m not about to say mothers have it easy, so don’t jump on that nut-hugger just yet. But it’s interesting to me that there’s at least two causes mothers have rallied together to fight, and formed organizations that fathers wouldn’t really be able to.

Mothers Against Drunk Driving or MADD. They can use catchy slogans like “It’s time to get MADD!”. Hell yeah. Get mad about drunk driving. That’s catchy, and poignant.

But if fathers got in on the action? It would be FADD. And, sure, it rings true. Mostly it’s dumb young douchebags who can’t hold their liquor properly that run about the town drinking and driving — thereby being a fad — but you can’t actually say that!.

Mothers Against Guns …

Did you happen to catch TNT’s Leverage (episode “The Stork Job”)? Did you see a familiar face, wandering around all thug-like?

Well, if you missed it, I have good news. I’ve put up a video compilation of my appearances in that episode. Click here to check it out.

So, I went “speed dating” sometime back in August and it turned out to be part of the hit trash reality show The Bad Girls Club.

I wish I could tell you all about that night. But, I’m under a strict NDA. What I can say is this…

I went into the night just trying to be calm, and not let anything bother me. I wasn’t about to play it up for cameras, or create fights and drama just so I could get a mention on The Soup or some shit.

However, the night got so fucking crazy and the GIRLS were so fucking crazy that.. I finally just snapped. All these months I’ve thought “I really hope they show my side when …

I saw the following photo today, and could barely believe the idiocy (click for larger version) :

That is to say – not only did someone actually think Barack Obama’s middlename has ANY bearing on his ability to lead, but they made a bumper sticker. Ahh but wait! Someone else thought “hey! that’s a good point” and stuck it on their car.

For my take on Obama, I direct you to this highlighted bit from a recent performance I did. This is my final word on the matter, and I thought it was important to note, so it was uploaded as its own piece, separate from the full performance :